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Dr. Metz's Slim World News Report |
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The Warty Side of Zen
TSC is Rogers Communciations
Canada's cable TV's largest Shopping Channel is called TSC. It's owned by Rogers Communications.

On August 11-12, 1998 after I warned TSC that Dr. Metz's Weight Loss Sandals for Women were
considered a scam by the FTC in the States,
on more than one occassion, they decided to run this infomercial produced by Rogers' TSC in their
Mississauga studio, anyway. They just couldn't do without their date with Super-Shari. The
Dr. Metz sandals had been the subject, not only of two FTC decisions but had been panned
by Allure magazine in September 1996 as something
akin to buying the Brooklyn Bridge.

Computer enhanced image of Metz's model who looks like she's just been retained as the covergirl
for the Montreux Clinic's recruitment brochure in Victoria, British Columbia. Let's face it she's
a Weight Watcher's dropout until she stepped on someone's foot with those crazy inserts.

Just back from recovery after her trip to Europe, where she helped sell Dr. Metz's Weight Loss
Sandals and Insoles to 2 million, (no make that 2.5 million fat EU skinny-wannabees, Shari Pataran
has the enviable position as nose tackle trying to fend off the marauders from HC and IC, as she
tip toes across our faces on the TSC.

So what do people do, they only have two sizes of sandals left to sell, and only size 6 or 7.
Even though almost 1600 items were sold before nighty-night time, these "Psychic Soles"
of the airwaves just sit around sputtering out claims that their Psychic Friends Network
buddies would disavow. It must be the "stomach region" that gives it power. Give
me a break, send these people back for some basic neurophysiolgy somewhere near Sverdlosk or
Carpathia. And take the station management with them. Where's Jojo when you need her?

If TSC and Shari say it's so, it must be so. But why am I losing so much weight just reading
about those insoles. I wonder if the power of suggestion works? Did you know that people can lose
weight just by walking into the bathroom and weighing themselves four times a day. Why don't we
put the TV in the bathroom? Then they can puke and eliminate all that TSC generated hot air, no
matter which end it comes out.

Oh My God They Killed Kenny - and look what they got? A 74 pound pile of flabby tales,
basted in a splendid, succulent, juicy, mouth watering confabulous sauce. But their
presentation as "crazy" as it seems makes Rogers piles of money. Who are
the stockholders kidding. They want more. If only Graham were here to set them straight.
More Screenshots






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